Breathing the darkness around my soul
Fading away, so slow
Celebrating emptiness and loneliness,
Since there's nothing left, to go through the day,
Only the ashes of a distant yesterday,
Slipping away, so fast,
I'm just a part of a dead past
I don't live, I don't die
I try, don't know why
No one by my side
A empty bottle, obsolete machine,
misplaced, erased, out of time
Embracing the shadows around my soul
Let them suffocate me, take me over, so slow
Pain fading away,
As all I am fade away too
Ready to go on, right in two,
Eat myself and drink my blood,
The only way, to go through the day
Wasted away, only a corpse in decay
No conversations, all my words just thrown away,
Lost my voice, had no choice,
Have nothing left to say, anyway,
Slipping away, so fast,
Not allowed to rest, getting rid of myself,
Have nothing left to say, anyway
So it's okay, I'll go all the way
So it's okay, I'm going away
Raped and erased
I'm just dust,
But still I must,
Lost somewhere in between,
This and that, nothing left but a spectre
I was not born to win
I just fall, and fall
I was never even born, at all
So I try, don't know why,
I don't live, I don't die,
Wings ripped while on the crib, so I won't fly
I don't live, I don't die,
I just try, and try,
Don't know why
terça-feira, 1 de março de 2016
Split
I'm a loser
(Hey, game is not even over yet)
Anyway, it's been already 5 years I always lose, in the end
(Not ALWAYS, exaggerating again...All winners had to lose over and over again before even start winning, forgot about that?)
Whatever, the only road I still see left for me is the road to the grave
(Finally! Surrender already! You fight for nothing, there's nothing, you are nothing! You know that too! Just go back to where all this insanity you call "Life" started, and end it once and for all!)
But there must be some way, I was never a surrender, I refuse to surrender, I don't know, something in me does not allow me to surrender, I guess that's just how my nature works...
(You are just being stubborn, as always, this is denial, you are really stupid, haven't you seen enough? Your existence is pointless, you are pointless, just end all this shit already, you worthless moron)
Maybe you are right, but I'm not sure. I don't even know how I would do this, anyway. Remember how many times I failed even on this? Now I don't even know how to try this anymore. So, well, that's it, I have to keep breathing
(It was always about death, you know that, all these years...So okay, forget what I said before, why don't you just kill them instead? All of them? Come on, I know you want to, I know exactly how much you want to do this, you always did, you even made all these plans, I saw it all, you can hide nothing from me, forgot about that? I'm here, always here, so this is another way to end it all..Once for all...Let's go, why not?)
Split, in many pieces
Split, can you all shut up?
Split, no one is here, well, except inside my head
Split, too much silence outside, too much noise inside
I don't know, yes, it's true, how can I deny? But it's easy for you to say, I'd rather be opressed on a norwegian - like prison and have a chance to get out, then rot for 30 years on a brazillian - like one with no chance to escape. So what about this, Mr Know - It - All? Easier said than done, huh?
(Good point. I admit. But I'm also right, and you know it, so admit it too. Admit it all!)
If I admit, would you shut up? At least for a bit? I know you will not go away, but stay quiet for a while, you are not helping, just making my head hurts so much that I'm going to bash it on the wall, so shut up, or I will shut you up, I can do that, and you know, but we both will die, is this what you want? You need me to exist, you idiot
(Yes, I'm a idiot, and so are you, I'm just a part of you, after all, and do you think I care? You are a mistake, I hate you, I hate myself, I hate us both, I hate it all, we are a mistake, so all I want is to fix it. I can attack you all want, if you attack me back, well, go ahead, our destruction, YOUR destruction, these are my goals, it will be my victory. I will be free. We both will be free. Think about it.)
Do you really think I can still think about anything? You just keep on talking, talking, all the freaking time, I can't even listen to the others, they are gone by now, I guess, but I wish I could at least listen to myself, so would you kindly, for the last time, just shut up?
(Sure. It changes nothing, anyway. I am the agent of your corrosion, so I already did my part. In the end, you will just do what I say, anyway. So whatever. You are still a pathetic loser)
I'm not a pathetic loser. Well, at least not just that, I know I'm much more than that. I just have no idea of what I am, but that does not matters, you won't beat me, I know you are just a infection, you work for them, and as they disappear from my view, so you disappear, you are getting weak, right? You do feel weak, I can see it, I see everything you do too, forgot about it???)
(Bingo. I hate when you use my words against me, that's so...Sociopathic. You make me sick, I hate you, how I hate you)
Yes, it's obviously sociopathic. You are the core of all things sociopathic, you are a software developed and installed by sociopaths, so I know how you work, too numb to fall on your games now, I can exist without you, but you...No, you can't really exist me, and you know that too. I can also NOT exist without you, you can't...Do or be NOTHING without me, I don't need you, you need me. And I hate you too, you make me sick too, so what?
(But I am still a part of you, so you are just attacking and insulting yourself)
Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows? I don't, and you know what, I don't care, you will be quiet now, because I will be too deaf to listen to you. So goodbye. It was all a lie, including you, you are just a weapon forged by lies. I had enough of lies. So GOODBYE
(I will never leave you alone, never, you know that you...)
That I...What? That I am a failure? A loser? A idiot? Damaged beyond repair? Stupid? Foolish? Etc etc? Yeah, whatever, whatever I am, it does not matters to me anymore, you wanted me to admit? They all wanted? Already did. And I just don't care about that, what difference it makes anyway now? None. So....Just whatever
(You will have a breakdown, you know, one of those, you know what I'm talking about, then I will be back, simple as that)
I have become a breakdown by this point, my friend, you are now fading, just like all the rest, are you sure you had success on your goals, as you call it?
Hey, where are you? Gave up? Thought I was supposed to do this...Well, I did somehow, but not like you wanted me to...That's quite ironic. Well, don't care if you are still there, I see you finally shut up, so that's enough for me.
Split right in two, in three
Split, right in four, in five, in six,
Lights on, but nobody's here, nothing left to fix
(The End....?)
(Hey, game is not even over yet)
Anyway, it's been already 5 years I always lose, in the end
(Not ALWAYS, exaggerating again...All winners had to lose over and over again before even start winning, forgot about that?)
Whatever, the only road I still see left for me is the road to the grave
(Finally! Surrender already! You fight for nothing, there's nothing, you are nothing! You know that too! Just go back to where all this insanity you call "Life" started, and end it once and for all!)
But there must be some way, I was never a surrender, I refuse to surrender, I don't know, something in me does not allow me to surrender, I guess that's just how my nature works...
(You are just being stubborn, as always, this is denial, you are really stupid, haven't you seen enough? Your existence is pointless, you are pointless, just end all this shit already, you worthless moron)
Maybe you are right, but I'm not sure. I don't even know how I would do this, anyway. Remember how many times I failed even on this? Now I don't even know how to try this anymore. So, well, that's it, I have to keep breathing
(It was always about death, you know that, all these years...So okay, forget what I said before, why don't you just kill them instead? All of them? Come on, I know you want to, I know exactly how much you want to do this, you always did, you even made all these plans, I saw it all, you can hide nothing from me, forgot about that? I'm here, always here, so this is another way to end it all..Once for all...Let's go, why not?)
Split, in many pieces
Split, can you all shut up?
Split, no one is here, well, except inside my head
Split, too much silence outside, too much noise inside
I don't know, yes, it's true, how can I deny? But it's easy for you to say, I'd rather be opressed on a norwegian - like prison and have a chance to get out, then rot for 30 years on a brazillian - like one with no chance to escape. So what about this, Mr Know - It - All? Easier said than done, huh?
(Good point. I admit. But I'm also right, and you know it, so admit it too. Admit it all!)
If I admit, would you shut up? At least for a bit? I know you will not go away, but stay quiet for a while, you are not helping, just making my head hurts so much that I'm going to bash it on the wall, so shut up, or I will shut you up, I can do that, and you know, but we both will die, is this what you want? You need me to exist, you idiot
(Yes, I'm a idiot, and so are you, I'm just a part of you, after all, and do you think I care? You are a mistake, I hate you, I hate myself, I hate us both, I hate it all, we are a mistake, so all I want is to fix it. I can attack you all want, if you attack me back, well, go ahead, our destruction, YOUR destruction, these are my goals, it will be my victory. I will be free. We both will be free. Think about it.)
Do you really think I can still think about anything? You just keep on talking, talking, all the freaking time, I can't even listen to the others, they are gone by now, I guess, but I wish I could at least listen to myself, so would you kindly, for the last time, just shut up?
(Sure. It changes nothing, anyway. I am the agent of your corrosion, so I already did my part. In the end, you will just do what I say, anyway. So whatever. You are still a pathetic loser)
I'm not a pathetic loser. Well, at least not just that, I know I'm much more than that. I just have no idea of what I am, but that does not matters, you won't beat me, I know you are just a infection, you work for them, and as they disappear from my view, so you disappear, you are getting weak, right? You do feel weak, I can see it, I see everything you do too, forgot about it???)
(Bingo. I hate when you use my words against me, that's so...Sociopathic. You make me sick, I hate you, how I hate you)
Yes, it's obviously sociopathic. You are the core of all things sociopathic, you are a software developed and installed by sociopaths, so I know how you work, too numb to fall on your games now, I can exist without you, but you...No, you can't really exist me, and you know that too. I can also NOT exist without you, you can't...Do or be NOTHING without me, I don't need you, you need me. And I hate you too, you make me sick too, so what?
(But I am still a part of you, so you are just attacking and insulting yourself)
Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows? I don't, and you know what, I don't care, you will be quiet now, because I will be too deaf to listen to you. So goodbye. It was all a lie, including you, you are just a weapon forged by lies. I had enough of lies. So GOODBYE
(I will never leave you alone, never, you know that you...)
That I...What? That I am a failure? A loser? A idiot? Damaged beyond repair? Stupid? Foolish? Etc etc? Yeah, whatever, whatever I am, it does not matters to me anymore, you wanted me to admit? They all wanted? Already did. And I just don't care about that, what difference it makes anyway now? None. So....Just whatever
(You will have a breakdown, you know, one of those, you know what I'm talking about, then I will be back, simple as that)
I have become a breakdown by this point, my friend, you are now fading, just like all the rest, are you sure you had success on your goals, as you call it?
Hey, where are you? Gave up? Thought I was supposed to do this...Well, I did somehow, but not like you wanted me to...That's quite ironic. Well, don't care if you are still there, I see you finally shut up, so that's enough for me.
Split right in two, in three
Split, right in four, in five, in six,
Lights on, but nobody's here, nothing left to fix
(The End....?)
segunda-feira, 29 de fevereiro de 2016
Rainbow Flag
Have you seen it?
They pillage our villages and tell you what to be
The rainbow flag, to disguise the vile attack
Is it really it?
Is it really you want to be?
Just a stereotype,
A prototype for what they want you to be
Don't you see?
Mr and Miss Revolution,
They are telling you what to fight for,
To fight against each other,
Sad puppets under the tower,
Only keeping them alive, fueling their power
Disguising the attack,
Behind the colorful rainbow flag
Nothing is what it seens
Nothing will be like before
None of us, will ever be like before
There's no way back, not anymore
But drown your tears, on the mall
You still can buy any lie,
Until the final fall
Then you will see,
You never really owned nothing at all
Why can't you see?
They have thrown acid on your eyes whle you were asleep
Now you wonder why you bleed, you think you are so big
Out there, demaning peace
Like if you had any power,
And first of all, a war inside yourself must cease
Divide and conquer,
Mirror and smokes
Join the army, they will tell you to fight
For equality
You won't realize
How far of each other that can be
Have you gone blind?
Puppets with no mind
Gathering in Berlin, Amsterdan, Sidney, Montreal
All around the world, celebrating your own fall,
All in the name, of your species ultimate shame
No, we don't really needed to self - destruct,
But no, we are not the same,
They got you in the pyramid game,
Now you attack, attack yourself, attack the attack,
All in the name, of the rainbow flag
They pillage our villages and tell you what to be
The rainbow flag, to disguise the vile attack
Is it really it?
Is it really you want to be?
Just a stereotype,
A prototype for what they want you to be
Don't you see?
Mr and Miss Revolution,
They are telling you what to fight for,
To fight against each other,
Sad puppets under the tower,
Only keeping them alive, fueling their power
Disguising the attack,
Behind the colorful rainbow flag
Nothing is what it seens
Nothing will be like before
None of us, will ever be like before
There's no way back, not anymore
But drown your tears, on the mall
You still can buy any lie,
Until the final fall
Then you will see,
You never really owned nothing at all
Why can't you see?
They have thrown acid on your eyes whle you were asleep
Now you wonder why you bleed, you think you are so big
Out there, demaning peace
Like if you had any power,
And first of all, a war inside yourself must cease
Divide and conquer,
Mirror and smokes
Join the army, they will tell you to fight
For equality
You won't realize
How far of each other that can be
Have you gone blind?
Puppets with no mind
Gathering in Berlin, Amsterdan, Sidney, Montreal
All around the world, celebrating your own fall,
All in the name, of your species ultimate shame
No, we don't really needed to self - destruct,
But no, we are not the same,
They got you in the pyramid game,
Now you attack, attack yourself, attack the attack,
All in the name, of the rainbow flag
A Lethal Statement
Daddy was alone, alone on his beautiful, perfect home
Waiting for his family, he had no idea soon it would all be gone
Daddy was attacked, daddy fell on the most lethal trap
Not his fault, it's not fair, it's a weak spot,
No one seens to understand, or care
It's just the way it is, now there's no way back
Poor daddy, poor daddy
Victim of a statement, what a literally fucking statement
Witth no mercy, or any chance to repent
They never say no, but well, how could they?
It's human nature, it's just another flaw,
How can someone like him, like us, escape from this claw?
And then he loses it all, buried on his own backyard,
And it's not fair, but who cares,
We just lose it all, they just take it all
Poor daddy, poor daddy, poor of us
Victims of statements, literally fucking statements
In the end, we were the ones who actually bent,
Ok, got it, message sent
Now remember, please, when they knock on your door,
Just keep it closed, keep yourself away,
Before you drink the sweetest poison, get so high,
And then fall forever, because you could not resist to play
Brace yourself, message sent
Now they are the hunters, we are the prey
For a fucking statement, for a fucking statement,
Now daddy's gone, and so is his familly, his life, and his home
Waiting for his family, he had no idea soon it would all be gone
Daddy was attacked, daddy fell on the most lethal trap
Not his fault, it's not fair, it's a weak spot,
No one seens to understand, or care
It's just the way it is, now there's no way back
Poor daddy, poor daddy
Victim of a statement, what a literally fucking statement
Witth no mercy, or any chance to repent
They never say no, but well, how could they?
It's human nature, it's just another flaw,
How can someone like him, like us, escape from this claw?
And then he loses it all, buried on his own backyard,
And it's not fair, but who cares,
We just lose it all, they just take it all
Poor daddy, poor daddy, poor of us
Victims of statements, literally fucking statements
In the end, we were the ones who actually bent,
Ok, got it, message sent
Now remember, please, when they knock on your door,
Just keep it closed, keep yourself away,
Before you drink the sweetest poison, get so high,
And then fall forever, because you could not resist to play
Brace yourself, message sent
Now they are the hunters, we are the prey
For a fucking statement, for a fucking statement,
Now daddy's gone, and so is his familly, his life, and his home
domingo, 21 de fevereiro de 2016
Good Kids Never Survive
If you don't wear a mask,
If you accept everything they ask,
Just to be accepted, if you don't counter - attack,
When they do that to you, if you don't wear a really good disguise,
Show them how strong you can be you just won't make it,
Because in this world, good kids never survive
You are not alone, despite of what you think,
It's your boat, but I just watch while you sink,
You will not adapt to a sick world, unless you are sick to,
If you are not, why still insist in having a place
In the hall of shame?
Along with all them?
Just play the game, and you will be fine,
But you must strike,
Because here, good kids never survive
So weak (That's what they want you to think)
So worthless (That's what they ant you to feel)
So dangerous (That's why they hate you)
So brightful (That's why they fear you)
Stand up for yourself,
Stand up for yourself,
Stop killing yourself, please
Wake up, dreams are nightmares in disguise,
Fight back, for all the respect you deserve to have,
Because in such a vile world,
Good kids never survive
And you are so much better than ou think you are,
You can be so much more than you are trying to be
If you accept everything they ask,
Just to be accepted, if you don't counter - attack,
When they do that to you, if you don't wear a really good disguise,
Show them how strong you can be you just won't make it,
Because in this world, good kids never survive
You are not alone, despite of what you think,
It's your boat, but I just watch while you sink,
You will not adapt to a sick world, unless you are sick to,
If you are not, why still insist in having a place
In the hall of shame?
Along with all them?
Just play the game, and you will be fine,
But you must strike,
Because here, good kids never survive
So weak (That's what they want you to think)
So worthless (That's what they ant you to feel)
So dangerous (That's why they hate you)
So brightful (That's why they fear you)
Stand up for yourself,
Stand up for yourself,
Stop killing yourself, please
Wake up, dreams are nightmares in disguise,
Fight back, for all the respect you deserve to have,
Because in such a vile world,
Good kids never survive
And you are so much better than ou think you are,
You can be so much more than you are trying to be
Have To
I never told you
I should have already told you
But I will, hopefully, someday soon,
I will tell you it all,
All that I saw
I don't know what was it that I saw
But I saw it all
I just did not told you
For some reason I also don't know
But with all that's left of my soul,
If I have the chance, I will,
I will show
And I hope to see the forms
Behind this strange glow
I don't expect you to understand
Why I was so scared
I can't complain, about the killing silence
If you don't talk back, when I call
Don't even know why you still see me, after all
I'm a mess, and I'm sorry,
But that's what I am,
It might be not enough,
But I really do the best I can
I don't expect you to understand
How I miss you
When you are away
And why I miss you that way
But, what else can I say?
You fill my feeble being with your overwhelming light,
All your world, gives me strenght to fight
I'm not sure if I deserve such prize
But I won't argue, not this time
And when we meet,
I hope I can tell you
Exactly what I saw
I don't know what was it that I saw,
But I saw it all, even before the last fall,
If you let me share it with you,
I will tell you it all,
But what's behind,
This strange glow?
I just want you to know
I'm sorry, don't understand why you still even worry
About me, don't understand how, why you still see me
I'm trying to be better,
But I will still be what I am,
A broken jar, so long ago
But I really do the best I can
I'm sorry, I will understand,
When you go
I should have already told you
But I will, hopefully, someday soon,
I will tell you it all,
All that I saw
I don't know what was it that I saw
But I saw it all
I just did not told you
For some reason I also don't know
But with all that's left of my soul,
If I have the chance, I will,
I will show
And I hope to see the forms
Behind this strange glow
I don't expect you to understand
Why I was so scared
I can't complain, about the killing silence
If you don't talk back, when I call
Don't even know why you still see me, after all
I'm a mess, and I'm sorry,
But that's what I am,
It might be not enough,
But I really do the best I can
I don't expect you to understand
How I miss you
When you are away
And why I miss you that way
But, what else can I say?
You fill my feeble being with your overwhelming light,
All your world, gives me strenght to fight
I'm not sure if I deserve such prize
But I won't argue, not this time
And when we meet,
I hope I can tell you
Exactly what I saw
I don't know what was it that I saw,
But I saw it all, even before the last fall,
If you let me share it with you,
I will tell you it all,
But what's behind,
This strange glow?
I just want you to know
I'm sorry, don't understand why you still even worry
About me, don't understand how, why you still see me
I'm trying to be better,
But I will still be what I am,
A broken jar, so long ago
But I really do the best I can
I'm sorry, I will understand,
When you go
domingo, 14 de fevereiro de 2016
Deadly Silence
It's not confortable, definitely brings no peace
This deadly silence just makes the inner enemy increase,
Remembers me how all this pain and these voices will never cease
Alone and broken, I yelled for help, untill my voice died
Yeah I'm a loser, I'm weak
But at least I tried
It became clear, how it all disappeared,
And no one was going to rescue me,
Or even talk to me
So I talk to them, as I can no longer ignore them
The inner enemies, keeping me strong against the enemies out there,
The only way to survive dwelling in this hell, surrounded by them
All the enemies, out there to get me,
All my friends, everyday more away,
Maybe I should just let them be,
Maybe I should just let them live in peace,
And make it all cease,
All the little that's still left of me
It's not something I can avoid, thrown in the void
Definitely a weak loser who can't make it alone
Just a virus, just a problem
Yeah, but at least I admit it, I admit it
I've failed life, I've failed death,
Just a collection of flaws, spawn of all human sickness,
I wish I was wrong, when I was that child staring at the future,
And looking away in despair, realizing there was no future at all,
It was just time bombs in endless countdown, exploding one by one,
Now it's all gone
I wish I was wrong, but how else could it be?
I always knew I would end up that way
With no more boards to play,
No place to stay
A pariah, wasted, with nothing left to say
Completely alone, I always knew everyone would go away,
One by one
Why would they stay, anyway?
I know I'm just a mistake, a disease
But I always did my best
Just wish I was allowed to rest
But there's no one to hear if I need to speak,
There's nothing left for me,
I wonder, how can I get out of here?
Too much noise in my head,
And this deadly silence, slaying me
Will it ever cease?
I will walk, someone just show me the door, please
This deadly silence just makes the inner enemy increase,
Remembers me how all this pain and these voices will never cease
Alone and broken, I yelled for help, untill my voice died
Yeah I'm a loser, I'm weak
But at least I tried
It became clear, how it all disappeared,
And no one was going to rescue me,
Or even talk to me
So I talk to them, as I can no longer ignore them
The inner enemies, keeping me strong against the enemies out there,
The only way to survive dwelling in this hell, surrounded by them
All the enemies, out there to get me,
All my friends, everyday more away,
Maybe I should just let them be,
Maybe I should just let them live in peace,
And make it all cease,
All the little that's still left of me
It's not something I can avoid, thrown in the void
Definitely a weak loser who can't make it alone
Just a virus, just a problem
Yeah, but at least I admit it, I admit it
I've failed life, I've failed death,
Just a collection of flaws, spawn of all human sickness,
I wish I was wrong, when I was that child staring at the future,
And looking away in despair, realizing there was no future at all,
It was just time bombs in endless countdown, exploding one by one,
Now it's all gone
I wish I was wrong, but how else could it be?
I always knew I would end up that way
With no more boards to play,
No place to stay
A pariah, wasted, with nothing left to say
Completely alone, I always knew everyone would go away,
One by one
Why would they stay, anyway?
I know I'm just a mistake, a disease
But I always did my best
Just wish I was allowed to rest
But there's no one to hear if I need to speak,
There's nothing left for me,
I wonder, how can I get out of here?
Too much noise in my head,
And this deadly silence, slaying me
Will it ever cease?
I will walk, someone just show me the door, please
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